A top tier legal firm has sent out a multi-coloured, comic sans message giving tips to staff about how to win the struggle against squalid smells.
In a multi-coloured pictorial guide, the chief human resources officer of the firm wrote about practising restraint with ‘odiferous’ foods, perfumes and pets in the workplace.
The email was entitled “Flowers, Fragrance, Fish, Broccoli and Fidos…..What they all have in common!” making a great effort that almost reached alliteration while posing a question which surely must have been asked throughout the ages.
In an effort to ensure no one could take the message seriously, brightly coloured comic sans and a host of random images found online were used.
There was also a helpful guide about the appropriate and inappropriate types of fish to eat in the office. Those that passed approval included Swedish Fish, a chewy lolly, and Goldfish Crackers.
Of course under such strict circumstances, not everyone was happy with the new guidelines especially those who actually like fish, cologne and pet pooches.
“I’m a practicing Pescetarian and now my ilk has been singled out for being odiferous! Perhaps this is the false flag before announcing market-shattering bonuses!” a source at the firm said when contacted by Above the Law.
The full email battling scandalous smells can be found for your enjoyment below: